Stouisrams Football Betting News

<< Jerome leads Birmingham over Portsmouth
Portsmouth, England (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - Cameron Jerome scored two goals in the first half and promoted Birmingham defeated Portsmouth 2-1 on Tuesday to move within six points of fourth place in England's Premier League. Birmingham won for t

<< Chiefs land RB Thomas Jones
Kansas City, MO (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - The Kansas City Chiefs announced the signing of free agent running back Thomas Jones on Tuesday. Terms of the signing were not released. Jones was released after three productive seasons with t

<< Bayern slips by Fiorentina on away goals
Florence, Italy (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - Arjen Robben's brilliant goal in the 65th minute capped a stretch of four combined goals in 11 minutes, as Bayern Munich slipped into the quarterfinals of the Champions League despite a 3-2 defeat at Fiorent

<< Spartans' Allen to miss Big Ten tourney opener
Detroit, MI (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - Michigan State junior guard Chris Allen has been suspended and will miss the Spartans' Big Ten Tournament opener on Friday. The Detroit Free Press reported that Allen was held out of practice on Tues

Saints ink CB Torrence >>
Metairie, LA (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - The New Orleans Saints agreed to terms with cornerback Leigh Torrence on a one-year contract Tuesday. Torrence spent the past two years with New Orleans, appearing in 12 total games. He had four

Tests confirm overactive thyroid for Reyes >>
Port St. Lucie, FL (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - The New York Mets confirmed the test results that stated shortstop Jose Reyes has an overactive thyroid. The club mentioned that Reyes will remain in New York to undergo additional blood testing,

FDU removes interim tag from Vetrone >>
Teaneck, NJ (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - Fairleigh Dickinson has removed the interim tag from Greg Vetrone and has named him the permanent men's basketball coach. Vetrone was given the job on an interim basis for last season and led the team to a 10-

Falcons sign CB Grimes >>
Flowery Branch, GA (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - The Atlanta Falcons have re-signed cornerback Brent Grimes. Grimes led the team with six interceptions in 2009, had 13 passes defensed and compiled 67 tackles, 58 of those solo, in 16 games. Ori

FOOTBALL TRASH TALK

Trash talk has a place in every competitive endeavor (except baseball; those stirrup-wearers are too busy chewing on their sunflower seeds and their supplements to worry about what their opponents are doing).

Fantasy sports is no exception. Any intelligent discussion of the subject would probably start with a thesis statement or a definition of terms. Thankfully, this wont be an intelligent discussion.

Let me just say that I am happy to take a place in this space alongside my talented colleagues, even our commissioner. (You should see how she bleats like a demented paper boy about league fees on our fantasy site).

Trash talking, I would argue, is primarily about amusing your friends, their sheeplike demeanors and sloping foreheads notwithstanding. The best place I have found for football trash talking is at www.SportsAlarm.com.

Beyond the entertainment factor, though, I would recognize that the sophomoric ritual has one advantage, when properly applied. It magnifies your fantasy triumphs and mitigates your fantasy failures by transforming the eventual point total into an afterthought. Winning makes it seem like your opponent really is a truss-owning, lapel-pin-wearing nitwit. And in defeat, trash talk can be the air bag to break the fall from your hyperbolic heights. The plug-necked yahoos on your team, you can say, will be sacking groceries by the end of the season.

The best trash talk, in my view, is layered and nuanced. And it doesnt focus only on your opponents team. It picks apart your opponent. The idea is to create a shock-and-awe-scale blizzard of nonsense, and the goal is to make your opponent drop his hands from his keyboard in exasperation.

What team does your opponent root for? Accuse a Giants fan of having a Joe Namath pillowcase. Wheres your opponent from? Give a look of concern no matter his reply, then say, I'll try to type slower for you next time. Is your opponent into politics? Label everyone a tax-and-spend corporate shill.

Cap all that with a liberal application of irrelevance. For instance, dont just conclude by saying your opponent is a twerp who drafts like my grandmother. Say that your opponent is a sweater-wearing, eyebrow-plucking twerp who drafts his team about as well as Zsa Zsa Gabor gave acceptance speeches at the Oscars. By the time your foe makes sense of that, his starting running back will have had puppies.

But what about you? Hmm? Recall a memorable slam? Have a tried-and-true technique? Know someone who seems impervious to insult? Take a moment and tells us about it. Put together some (fit-for-publication) thoughts. You wont be too busy returning phone messages from your friends, Im sure, to reply.

In addition to the trash talking, the Sports Alarm has a huge gallery of high resolution pictures of beautiful women and models in bikinis. The most popular models are: Lindsay Lohan, Carrie Underwood, Alessandra Ambrosio, and Paris Hilton.